THE ROAD TO HELL
The saying “The road to hell is paved with good intentions” means that simply having good intentions is not enough; actions and results are what truly matter. The proverb highlights that a person’s good intentions can lead to negative or harmful outcomes, either because they fail to act or because their actions have unforeseen negative consequences.
The proverb can be understood in two main ways:
- A failure to act: This interpretation emphasizes that well-meaning thoughts and desires have no real value unless they are followed by tangible actions. A person may intend to do good, but through laziness, procrastination, or other flaws, they never follow through. In this sense, a road to hell is built from all the good deeds that were meant to happen but never did.
- Example: Someone may intend to visit a sick friend but never gets around to it, leaving the friend to feel forgotten.
- Actions with unintended negative consequences: A person may act on their good intentions, but due to poor judgment, ignorance, or flawed execution, their actions lead to harmful or disastrous results. This is related to the law of unintended consequences.
- Example: In the 1970s, Asian carp were introduced to the United States to control algae blooms in contained areas. The intention was to benefit the local ecosystem. However, the carp escaped and spread throughout the Mississippi River System, where they have caused significant environmental damage.
- Results are more important than intentions. It is a warning that good motives do not excuse harmful outcomes.
- One must think through the full consequences of their actions. The devil, as the saying goes, is in the details. What seems like a good idea on the surface may hide complex and problematic outcomes.
- The path of least resistance is often dangerous. This interpretation, famously advanced by author C.S. Lewis, suggests that evil often enters the world not through dramatic, wicked acts, but through a gradual slide of compromise and inaction.
- Saving of others comes from an altruistic nature to not want to see others suffering and to want to assist them. But it is naive to assume others will want YOUR assistance. As you are still judging others as “lost or needing saving or in defect” according to YOUR standards, which is subjective and other people have other ways of living to yours.
- It is not your responsibility or task to save, guide, steer, prompt or intervene in other people’s lives on their paths. If you are busy meddling in other people’s lives, then you are too busy not attending to your own path and affairs.
- Discernment of where you invest your energies. People ask for your help but not all can understand it, or will believe it or do it. Not all can be saved or need to be saved by you as they have to save themselves. Self-love to be able to love others. The work we do on ourselves is the greatest gift to others.
- To remember that you will only offer your wisdom to those who ask it of you and request it, yet at the same time knowing it is only they that can learn it or not.
The saying serves as a reminder that:
You would not want to hurt another by trying to help them, you would not want issues and problems to arise in your life because you are too busy entangled in other people’s lives. You would not want to absorb other people’s issues that have been placed upon you.
These are the types of consequences that come from wanting to help others.
It is the most noble intention from a loving heart to wish to help rescue others, but is it you who is assuming that they need “rescuing” and not them? They may not need anything other than the experience they are having now in their lives, in order to grow and learn more about themselves in the process of going through that experience. Which may look like suffering to you and may well be suffering for that individual, but it also would be that persons opportunity to learn from life’s lessons that then help them to thrive after.
Just Info
You can only meet people where they are at, as deep as they have met themselves, or as deep as they are prepared to go.
If people need assistance, then just try to be conscious of the type of information you give that is best for them, but without entangling yourself in their issues. Also offer information only if requested and never force your own opinions and judgements and standards onto others.
If you feel that others are “lost” it means that you are, because you are too busy looking at others and not looking at your own. Or you assume yours is a better place than the others, or you are arrogant to think you know better. Or that you are thinking too greatly of your own abilities. All of these are reasons why people meddle in others’ lives. They may not want to deal with their own issues in their own lives so get involved in others as a way to distract them from dealing with their own lives. So a denial or self-lying or avoidance exercise. You cannot save others and it’s not your judgement to identify people you think need it.
Never impose or dominate your views on others. If the info resonates then it will go in, if it doesn’t it won’t. Don’t hold on to or own the info, it’s just info. Then you are not beholden to own it, have to defend it, prove it or convince others of the weight or importance of it. The information is neutral then and you are not attached to an outcome nor creating any expectations of the person you are telling it to by giving the info.
The best way to help people is to help yourself become a better more self-loving individual at peace with yourself. Then this way of self-love can be shown in the “being of it”, doing of it. The “verb” of embodying it can you show how love works. Loving the self and not causing or creating conflict with others is the best state to be. You are not causing large ripples or conflicts, and you are experiencing this realm, while observing and understanding yourself in those interactions. Love is the best way we self-love and save ourselves, which shows the way for others to see as an example of being. This then becomes the tools you use for others to understand and resonate with. Which then brings clarity to them when they adopt similar ways of being but in their own unique flavours.
The more people self-love, on a collective level, the less suffering there will be, and more will thrive.
Matt Bell
💖🙏🌟